It was up for less than eight hours and I started getting emails. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did...a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long. One person pointed out that I was being unrealistic on how long I was having my character hit a golf ball, the story was a fantasy but hey he was right about it being unrealistic, and he had brought it up politely so no reason not to make a. "Oh, hi, Mr. Hardown!" she exclaimed. "How have you been?" "Lousy," he said. "I've been stuck doing paperwork. It sucks." "You make sucking sound like a bad thing," she replied. Jenna gave Mr. Hardown a dirty wink. He shook his head. What a dirty little cheerleader. "You know full well that that's not what I meant," he said. "Alright, I have to go. Have fun." "Oh, don't worry," she answered. "I will." Jenna sprinted towards the football field. Her tiny miniskirt bounced up as she ran, and. More

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