‘This room needs a makeover.’ ‘I think so too. How can you be a seducer and a practical décor adviser in the space of five minutes? ‘Be fair,...I didn’t get far because you burst in where you weren’t wanted.’ ‘I see. So I’m to blame for my mother not being seduced by our family company’s newest employee?’ ‘Put that way, yes.’ ‘Do you go around fucking women and then fuck their daughters?’ ‘Now that you mention that, no. I don’t get very far with most females and they are usually around my own. I’d say they’re a good thirty-eight C, but they’re too saggy from having children. Ugh, they’re gross to look at. Wish I’d left the bra on. I slap her hard out of angry disappointment.She oofs and then talks some more. “But you’ll probably get caught. Don’t you have something to care about? What will happen when you’re locked up?”“No. The only thing I cared about was my dog, Bingo. And he just fell off a cliff.” This conversation isn’t as fun as I thought it would be. I need more crying to get. More

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