“How old are you?”“32. I was born on Christmas Day 1982. I am the Brown Jesus!”“I was born in July 1983 so you're six months older than me.�...�“Wow. You have really nice tits you know. How come they're not all saggy like my mum's tits?”“Maybe because I haven't had k**s yet?! Dickhead!”Initially he told me he was from Kabul but that turned out to be a joke. In reality he was born in Leicester making him twice as English as me.Two weeks later and he was staying at my flat, he was still with Scarlett. .. I ... I..." Stammered Pete."Oh PETER! How could you?" demanded their mother. "Didn't you know what a special event that is?" Well, no. Look, I was just trying to help." I can't believe I'm not a virgin." Moaned Mindy on the verge of tears.Megan smirked, "What's the matter, pervert? Plan not coming together?" Megan," interrupted Pete, "I really think you should shut up." Pete suddenly remembered the obedience command he had programmed into all the women. "In fact I really think you should all. More

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