“How’d it go in there?” I said.“Um…fine I guess?”I didn’t respond. I looked at her in a way that said I expected her to continue.“I me...n I’m not pregnant so…” she gestured at nothing and nobody.“Congratulations,” I said. “On not having a child.” I laughed a little bit. She smiled.“I actually have to…” She stuck her thumb out at her car as if it was a faraway object. I almost interrupted her. Women love it when you almost, but not quite, interrupt them. Wait for them to finish then jump in. That's why they call me Crotch. All my damn pants have stains on them. Semen stains. These were new slacks. I bought them this afternoon. Oh, shit! I'm sorry Rachel. I ... I'll leave now if you don't mind."My evil mind went into overtime."Wait! Just a second. Come on, get those slacks off and the ... whatever you've got on underneath too. I'll throw them in the washer. Surprisingly, he did."Now will you admit that you owe me something?" I asked gently."Well, yeah?" Get back on the couch. More

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