” God smiled. “Think about it -- who can he tell?”She’s Apple’s MateWhat do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab apple!Why...did Eve want to leave the garden of Eden and move to New York? She fell for the Big Apple!Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard? Someone told him he should get an apple MacHow do you make an apple turnover? Push it down hill.What kind of apple isn’t an apple? A pineapple.What did the apple say to the apple pie? “You’ve got some crust.”If. My roommate's girl lie helpless and bloody against the torn bedsheets, her legs hoisted up in the air, her body limp and the nearest to death I had hoped any human could be. Above her was something perplexing. It was, in its own way, human. Two large arms grasping at her hips, a pair of legs standing straight and pressing against her brutally. What was inhuman was essentially anything else. While it had a humanoid form, its flesh was the darkest blackness my mind could comprehend. It lacked any. More

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