Only three stars.Scene: costume partyA: what are you dressed as?B: can’t you tell, I’m a harp!A: your costume is too small to be a harp...B: calli...g me a lyre?!Bloke goes to a costume party, stark naked, painted green with his girlfriend on his back. Someone asks ‘what are you supposed to be?’, he replies ‘I’m a tortoise’. ‘What about her?’, he replies... ‘that’s Michelle’I told my doctor that when I travel from country to country I have the urge to get drunk. She told me I’m a borderline. Getting out of her car and walking back to the locker room she was muttering under her breath about how her coach had better make it up somehow. Waking to the locker room she found it open and put the little doorstop in. Looking around she found the bag of balls and jerseys in the office. Pulling out her phone she texted her coach saying that she had found them. Just after she hit send she felt someone grab her from behind and throw her against the wall, stunned by the initial blow she couldn't. More

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