I met Carol after she had made a sale; I've been taught to always encourage the sales people to hand deliver the mortgage application to my office. Th...t's for legitimate business reasons; the ones that I can boink are just a bonus.Carol was, I'm groping for words here, not unattractive. Her face would never appear in a cosmetics advertisement, nor would her tits sell sweaters or bras. But still, she was pleasant to look at and I would not be embarrassed to be seen with her in a restaurant or a. .. As you know, I struggle with trying to distract myself with other tasks or activities that might help take my mind off how unworthy I feel - and how much wine I've consumed in recent months - but nothing is helping. I can't even find someone who is willing to hold me for longer than a few hours, without it being in between meaningless sex. Hell, at this point, even a friend would be nice. Someone I can just talk to who would be willing to listen and make sure I don't die from alcohol. More

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