"I live by myself with two cats. I could make an effort and find myself in bed with a woman every week if that's what I wished. I do not wish it. I wi...l gladly trade sex for smiles and laughter and intelligent conversation." You might find a woman who provides all of that." Might. Might not. I've found several who provide the first but fall short of the second." Then why me?" Why you, what?" Why am I here?" Because you called ME. And because I found last evening to be entertaining and. That's no way to talk.Monica: (points to Dad) See what I mean? He's horrible. I'm embarrassed to be around him.Host: Now, Dad, you know why you're here, don't you?Dad: Yeah. She wants me to change. Ha!(Audience begins to boo again)Dad: I'm happy just the way I am.Host: Well, she's decided that she's had enough of your shenanigans and wants you to become a new person. Are you willing to try?(Dad grumbles)Monica: Come on Daddy. Please.Dad: Well... all right. For her, I'll give it a try.(Audience. More

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