So I held it in long enough to open the door. As I pushed open the portal and opened my mouth to say something to the effect of ‘C’mon in,’ I he...rd the most teeth-rattling noise I had ever heard to that day. As I stood there dumbly, the entire building crashed down around me. When the dust cleared I held in my hand the only recognizable part of my home, the doorknob. ‘Well this is a fine How Do You Do!’ exclaimed Newton. ‘Aw BatPoop™!’ I yelled. Somehow this didn’t seem quite as funny as it did. He told me that it was him that set me up with the Sarge, he wanted me to be able to use the CRB ute but didn't want to take the chance of me having a smash.We were having a quiet cuppa when he asked me what I was going to do about National Service. Jesus, here we go again, how long before I get sprung about my age. The only good thing about it was the fact that I didn't have a birth certificate."You have to register at the drill hall. When you get your call up I'm going to need a relief cook,. More

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